Saturday, January 23, 2010

Let's Rewind (original post date 2/18/09)


A lot had been happening in the Sneed Family the last few months. I feel blessed beyond words as God has proven himself faithful to our family and trusting in the Lord with all my heart has a whole new meaning. It's been so long since I posted last and life has changed a lot for us the past few months. We have been very busy with work and the farmhouse. I want to share all that has been going on but I think I''ll rewind a ways just to give you a better feel for how blessed we are feeling right now. I think I had mentioned in a previous post that we had taken a little get away trip to Dallas one weekend in October. It was a simple little trip but it meant a lot to me. I had been dealing with some pretty heavy anxiety and depression the previous couple of months and just couldn't seem to snap out of it. My heart was broken as we had been trying to get pregnant for two years at that point with out success. I have always held Proverbs 3:5 & 6 close to my heart and believed in God's goodness and the good things he had for us. But for some reason I hit a rough patch and felt that God had left me behind. It was a really dark time for me and I feared it would never end. I'm pretty sure Houston feared that too as he (bless his heart) was at his wits end with me. Depression is such a scary thing and I remember trying to find something to lift my spirits or to “make me happy”. Although this is going to sound funny, in all seriousness, I had found something that sounded like fun and made me smile. Please don't laugh. Okay you can laugh and I'll laugh with you! I discovered that Jessica Simpson was scheduled to make a stop at the Texas State Fair during her tour of fairs and it was free with admission to the fair. I realize it sounds terribly silly that seeing Jessica in concert would bring me out of my deep depression but I don't think that was the intention but rather it sounded like a fun thing to do. I had always heard the Texas State Fair was fun and Houston and I enjoy that kind of thing. So we planned our trip and I was looking forward to it. By mid October the Lord had helped me to finally come out of the sad darkness I was in and I was feeling much better. I was still very much looking forward to our weekend getaway. I mean who wouldn't be totally stoked to see Jessica Simpson!? We had a lot of fun. We ate some fair food, walked through the buildings, and looked at the animals. But at 6pm I had to ditch Houston to stand at the very front of the Chevrolet Main Stage and wait patiently for two hours for Jessica's concert to begin. No, I'm not joking. I stood there. By myself. For two hours. As I stood there and people watched, I noticed the area was filling up with twenty one year old blonde Jessica Simpson look-a-likes. I'll admit I felt pretty stupid but it was just a fun and girly thing to do and I thoroughly enjoyed every minute. Houston joined me just before the concert began. Jessica was great and it was fun seeing her in person. She sang all of her new songs from the country album and a few others.


After the concert we got cotton candy and headed for the rides. We decided to look for the most extravagant and thrilling ride we could find. We definitely found it and let me just say that I enjoy this kind of thing, even that tiny bit of fear is fun to me. However, as this ride began and I was thrust 165ft high in the air overlooking what seemed like all of Texas, I felt more than just a tiny bit of fear. In fact, I was terrified and in tears! When it was over, it literally took me about an hour to recover. I think I was in shock. After recovering I had somehow convinced myself it was so much fun and the best ride ever. We spent the night in Dallas and had fun the following day doing some shopping and piddling around. There is a point to this story, sort of. Basically it was a really memorable trip for me at a time when I needed it. I felt like we were two kids on a romantic and fun date to the fair complete with cotton candy and Jessica Simpson. It helped me to relax a little and remember to enjoy Houston and our time together, just the two of us. Also, it was that weekend I realized that we had failed at our attempt to conceive for the twenty fifth time and I was in desperate need of a distraction...

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